Ever since my husband and I found out that we were expecting, I couldn’t wait to hold my little bundle of joy in my arms. After years of imagining what this would actually feel like, I expected nothing short of blissful joy and contentment as she finally lay with her beautiful eyes gazing at me. Yet, there were times when I felt a deep sinking feeling at the bottom of my stomach, which I had never imagined would be associated with this moment and I was not prepared for it. My emotions were a rollercoaster of extreme highs and extreme lows. I hadn’t felt this crazy, angry, tired, exhausted, and irritated with people around me and myself all at the same time. I never had such a hard time controlling my emotions before. In a matter of seconds, I switched from being elated with my baby to crying my eyes out for no obvious reason. I did not know what was happening to me and felt out of control.
I shared my feelings of anxiety with the lady who did my sutkeri oil massage. She thought it was bizarre that someone would feel sad after having a beautiful healthy baby. Definitely, the wrong person to talk about such a deep matter with. I told my elder, experienced sister I was feeling overwhelmed and she said it is just part of being a new mother.
Baby blues refers to mood changes and feelings of worry and exhaustion that many mothers face in the first 2 weeks after having a baby. Babies require round-the-clock care, so it’s normal for mothers to feel tired or overwhelmed during this time. However, my feelings of anxiety and emotional turbulence continued two weeks post-partum as I still found myself crying multiple times a day.
I had read that if mood changes and feelings of anxiety or unhappiness are severe, or if they last longer than 2 weeks, it might be due to postpartum depression. I found my situation confusing because I realized that my condition was not extreme to the point of being debilitating but there certainly was something that couldn’t be ignored either. I realized that if this was a case of post-partum depression then I would not feel better unless I received some help.
I reached out to a friend who gave me a number of a therapist and I found it extremely relieving to be able to download my mental clutter and be able to share everything with a professional with no preconceived notions and an objective perspective. It is not sufficient to say that there isn’t a lot of focus or importance given to mental health in countries like Nepal due to the social stigma attached to it.
While things are changing slowly here, there is still a preconceived notion that only extreme cases of mental health need professional attention.
There is a plethora of information available online on post-partum depression. Thankfully access to information in today’s world is not the biggest challenge. But knowing where to get help and how in a society like in Nepal can be challenging. I am thankful that my friends and family were supportive enough to accept my situation and guide me towards help before my condition escalated. Knowing and being aware that this was a psychological condition was a very important initial step towards my recovery process. However, I am sure that there are many people who may not have had the chance to understand and deal with this condition properly. It is easy to imagine and guess that many cases of post-partum depression, especially in countries like Nepal will go undiagnosed. In fact, it has also been found that maternal postpartum depression can cause post-partum depression in fathers well.
Sometimes we are just surviving and not thriving and that is okay. Even when we know we need to reach out for help, we sometimes don’t know where to reach out to for help. Information on therapists needs to be specific and accessible, and hopefully, no one has to suffer due to lack of this information.
Prathama Raghavan: prathama.raghavan@protonmail.com
Raji Manjari: manjariraji@gmail.com
Mamata Pokharel: mamatapk@gmail.com
Anita Prajapati: aneeta.sk@gmail.com
Helplines for Clinical and Psychological Counselling:
Midwives’ Society of Nepal
Toll free:16600100046
In terms of emergency, Consulting and Counselling service is available 24/7
For general and non-emergency inquiry, service hours: 8 am to 4 pm
Office Phone number:+977-1-4101156
Website: http://www.midson.org.np/
Email: infomidwivesnepal@gmail.com
Transcultural and Psychosocial Organization
Toll-free number:16600102005
Service available in terms 8 am to 6 pm throughout the week
Office Phone number: +977-01-4431717/4437124/4424082
Website: TPO Nepal
Email: tponepal@tponepal.org.np
Credits:
https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/perinatal-depression/index.shtml
